Wednesday, 9 August 2017

A Facebook Update

It's been a couple of months since I came off Facebook and I thought people might be interested in how it was going seeing as it is such a big thing these days and practically EVERYONE seems to be on it.

Well, I am still off it and have no plans to go back on. The only thing I might do is go and download all the photos on there so I can print them off and keep them- yes, actual hard copies of photos! So few people seem to do that these days. I miss them!

The main thing I've noticed since coming off Facebook is firstly, how little I missed it after only about 3 days and secondly, how much nicer it is to stay in contact with people. What I mean by that is that the real friends I have are messenging me through text, email or Wattsapp and we have an actual conversation. Not just a 'like' here and there as we skip through our 'newsfeed' but actual conversations that are engaging and meaningful. Friends are sending me photos they are posting on FB, as they know I won't see them, and we have a chat about them and catch up. They make a real effort and I do the same. Since I came off FB one of my friends had sent me 2 lovely cards thanking me for my support to her during a difficult time. We were always close but chat almost every night now I'm off FB.

The thing I wonder is 'do I miss seeing what 'not close' friends are doing?'. A bit, maybe. But not enough at the moment to go back on. I think because most people only put the good things they get up to on FB, it can give you a distorted view of other people's lives. With true friends you know not only of the good bits that they put on FB but you will be aware of all of the struggles and hard times they go through too as it is likely you will be supporting them through it. If all you really know about someone is what they put on FB then, maybe the view you see of their life, can be misleading.

I know FB is a great way for some people to keep in touch, and for people, not like me (!) who can go on it occasionally and enjoy it for what it is, it's great. But, as DH was saying today. What would the world be like if, for one month, the internet was just turned off. What if we all went back to the 80's for a month, not that long ago when you think about it. No social media, no internet, no Instragram or Twitter, no YouTube or email. Back to letters, phone calls, postcards(!), posted newsletters and 4 channels on the tele. No digital radio, Kindles, CD players, smart phones, mp3 players or DVD players. What would everyone do instead of looking at their phones all the time?!

I am definately going to be thinking more about the technology we let into our lives. I don't believe modern is always better and I think it's easy to get sucked in to modern life. It's not easy to stay on a more traditional path as, with everyone on social media etc, you can feel like you're left out if you're not 'staying current' or on a friends Facebook Chat Group or Forum.

So, I am going to make the effort to reach out to all my friends on FB (there arnt many!). I have 5 friends I regularly Wattsapp message and would consider very good friends. I am going to go back on FB tonight and let everyone know I'm coming off FB (in case they hadnt noticed) and give people my mobile number if they don't have it,  and let them know they can message me or write to me and let me know they want to keep in touch and we can message or write snail mail. If people don't want to then that's fine, I'm happy to let things move on. If they do, great! It will hopefully be a good way to get properly back in touch with people. I feel maybe I shouldn't ask people to be the first one to make the effort to message me but I don't have everyone's contact numbers so I will need people to message me so I can contact them back.

I hope by doing this I will be able to have a more personal relationship with people In may have lost touch with apart from through Facebook. I realise I'm rambling now, I hope I haven't offended anyone with my Facebook post. It's just my thoughts. Nighty night.


  1. Hallo Gillie, this is my first comment on your blog and I agree with you about Facebook. I have never been on FB nor do I have any inclination to do so. I also agree with your husband and would love to go back before computers ruled all communications. Yes I would miss the blogs, but I managed perfectly fine before them.
    I communicate by letter, notecards and telephone. I do have a mobile which I keep for emergencies and I do text a couple of people on it. I believe the Royal Mail is having problems due to the internet and I think we would all regret the passing of it, if it came to be.
    I have some strong views on this, but won't elaborate here.
    I'm glad you've seen sense about FB and I hope you can resist the temptation of going back on it.

    Joan (Devon)

    1. Hi Joan. Thank you so much for taking the time to comment. It would be so interesting to go back for a while without internet etc. It is possible to do that today, but harder without everyone doing it and being in the same boat, so to speak. Wish more people wrote letters and cards, it's always such a treat to get something hand written in the post :) G

  2. I think you are extremely wise for your age. I'm not on Facebook but my grown up children are. I feel like you that I much prefer a real conversation vs a thumbs up or some trivial comment. It would be a fun experiment to disconnect ourselves from this modern world for a day or two! Take care, Pat xx

    1. I know what you mean Pat. I feel like in a way, Facebook made me a lazy friend. I think t takes much more effort to maintain relationships off Facebook, and that in turn, these relationships are much more rewarding :)

    2. Whilst I agree face to face contact is better than Facebook please remember people for whom it is a window on the world. We have 8 grandchildren all leading busy fulfilled lives and they find Facebook a wonderful way to send us a photo and comment on where they are and what they are doing. I am house bound and find it a great means of being involved with their lives in between seeing them all. We do ring and write to lots of friends but find the modern means of communication great. We are making arrangements for our 2 grand daughters to stay tonight and a quick series of message whilst one is on her way to work and it is all done! So not all modern things need to be bad!

    3. I absolutely agree and I too use modern communication as I said in my post. I just think one-to-one communication is better and more personal than the Facebook way. I see what you mean about keeping in touch with busy people, but I think I was certainly guilty of just chucking photos and posts up on Facebook and letting everyone see rather than making the effort to send someone a photo with a personal message. I know I would rather have one photo from a friend with a message attached directed at me than just see a load of photos that I can go through and 'like' without having that personal touch that has become so important to me.